Fingers Under the Door
I was in the bathroom the other day when I saw five little fingers reaching under. I am not so sure what it was about that moment but it was the first time I really felt ownership of those little fingers. Not in a "I own my TV" kind of way. It's more of a "you belong to me, you belong with me" kind of way. My attachment process to Caleb has been difficult journey; one of the more difficult and surprising aspects of adoption for me. I'd share more than that with you over a cup of coffee, but for now, we'll leave it at that. I have recently figured out that one of my biggest hurdles in attaching was the guilt I feel at "taking" Caleb from his biological Momma. I know that's not reality, but when I see the joy of a child he is, my heart aches for her and what she is missing. I am fully aware that our delight in him is at the cost of their relationship with each other and it just breaks my heart. And I'm ok with that but I can't l...