Caleb Update

I haven't been a great blogger this past year. It's just been full. Life has been full.

Caleb had his 3 year check up and his pediatrician said it looks pretty healthy. He's 30.8 pounds and 38 inches tall. She did hear a heart murmur and we have been concerned because he gets out of breath easily. So we will be making a trip to the pediatric cardiologist soon. We'll keep you posted.

Caleb still doesn't say very many words and only one or two that are truly understandable. His speech therapist has said he has speech apraxia. That basically means that his brain has trouble telling his mouth what to do.  He still has a lot of muscle weakness (part of why we want to check his heart). The muscle weakness in his face and mouth make it difficult for him to make sounds. We have taught him quite a few sign language words and are working on getting a picture card communication system going.

It has been very difficult to accept his lack of speech. We definitely thought he would be speaking by now. The progress has been so slow and that can be very frustrating. The speech therapist and other therapists say it could be a long road for him. This makes me sad. But we are hopeful and thankful that he now has access to the tools he needs to learn.

Before you adopt they tell you, and you read about the affects of orphanage life (no matter how good the orphanage was), but until you see it in your own child, you can't really grasp it. It has definitely been a grieving process for me. We knew about the cleft lip and palate ahead of times, so the surgeries have been easier to accept. But the lack of speech, developmental delays, and sensory issues have been tougher for me.

Even though I tried not to have a picture perfect view of how things would be, I really expected him to progress quicker. But he is my son, I love him, he has made progress in so many ways and we are proud of him for that. And hopeful for the future.

The other day we were at a restaurant for Bethy's bday and they were on the indoor playground together and we were in the restaurant watching. He was following his sister around, climbing the ladders, crawling through tunnels, and sliding down slides. I commented how different this is from a year ago when he barely left our sides and if he did it was to go and hug a stranger. Thankful for the leaps he has made!

I asked Tom yesterday what if nothing ever changes. What if Caleb never speaks, if he always does his sensory seeking behaviors, if he can never drink out of a straw, what if he's always like this? Tom said,"Well we love him and like him now, and he's fun to be around so I think it will be the same then."

He's right. We love this little guy that is so passionate about life and full of energy and love. We'll stand beside him even if he never learns another new word.


Comments

Rita and John said…
It's amazing how far a child can come in a year, even when there are still challenges ahead. We'll keep you all in our prayers. I love that last photo of you with your beautiful children!
Amy said…
Katie,
I just love reading your updates on your kids! Connor has speech apraxia, when he was three he wasn't even calling me Mommy yet, he could only say about 10 words. He had an awesome speech therapist and is going to something called the Early Learning Program through Early Intervention. He goes to school and receives speech therapy at school. He will be starting again this year. I know how hard it is to watch your child struggle and feel so helpless. Connor is doing great with his speech now, he still has trouble with some sounds, but he has made so much progress. I will be thinking about you and Caleb and hope that he will gain more words in time. And I hope all goes well at the cardiologist!

-Amy L.
Jerusha said…
Great post. You know I understand. :)
Anonymous said…
I ran across your blog from China Adopt Talk. Thank you so much for sharing. I have just adopted a son about two months ago who is also 3 and with about the same exact issues. He has a repaired CL/CP and says about two words. I am having such a hard time trying to accept that my son doesn't really talk. He only has vowel sounds and m. It has been so hard, and I feel so guilty. I don't know how to connect with him; I want so desperately for him to talk. Anyway, thanks so much; it helps that I'm not alone even though I don't know what to do.

Wishing the best for your family~~