Help Me Brainstorm

Help me brainstorm:

Caleb has been very particular about the blankets on his bed for quite a while. He wants them on in a certain order- sheet, brown polka dot blanket, blue blanket, Bambi blanket. They all have to be tucked in and straight, going right up to the edges of his bed. Not too big of a deal in the scheme of life. Well, for the past three nights he has screamed out in the middle of the night, and I mean, screaming mad, until we come. What's the problem? He wants the blankets fixed. And then he's fine and goes back to sleep. And I spend the next hour trying to get back to sleep. Last night I tried to have him fix it himself with me standing there but that didn't work.

So, do we just suck it up and get up each night and fix the blankets and hope it's a phase? Do we pile on the attention and affection even more than normal during the day and hope it's just that? Do we try and get him to fix it himself or deal with it?


Help?

Comments

Jerusha said…
Oh, how frustrating. I have no expert advice, of course. S is kind of rigid about certain things, but what's weird is that the rigidity will pop up out of the blue--something that he didn't care about two weeks ago is suddenly a big deal. So we've had issues with t-shirt vs. long sleeve shirt, what kind of cereal for breakfast, what he wears to bed. No screaming in the night, thank God, but some tantrums. Our therapist suggested (for him) intentional variety to keep him out of that rigidity. So he eats a different cereal every morning; I make him wear a long sleeve shirt if it's weather-appropriate. We try to change things up so he learns that life can be flexible and change doesn't have to be scary. Those are just our experiences, and we've handled them being fairly sure of what our son was able to reasonably "get over."
April 30, 2013 at 8:15 AM
Rita @ Open Window said…
Oh, dear. So hard on you and everyone. One idea would be to offer a reward to him for every night he does not wake Mama up. If we make it through the night without anyone waking us up, I give them noodles in our noodle jar, which is leading them to each get a small toy of their choice once it's full. I'm not sure whether he would understand that. Do you think getting a larger blanket that could be tucked in would take care of things--or maybe it's not possible to change to different blankets. Another idea--not sure if this is a good one either--would be to buy one of those sleep sacs (they make them for children who are pretty big, up to 5T, I think) and see if that gives him the warmth he is worried about instead of the blankets. (http://www.target.com/p/halo-big-kids-sleepsack-micro-fleece/-/A-14512082?ref=tgt_adv_XSG10001&AFID=Google_PLA_df&LNM=%7C10332477&CPNG=Women&kpid=10332477&LID=PA&ci_src=17588969&ci_sku=10332477) Or maybe it's not a physical comfort thing...? I'll keep brainstorming.
April 30, 2013 at 8:44 AM
Rita @ Open Window said…
And I suppose another option would be to tell him before he goes to bed that you will not be coming in if he screams, but I don't know where you are with attachment, so I don't want to suggest something that might be out of line. I notice that on the nights when I announce clearly that they will not call for me until the sun is up in the morning, we do a little better. It might be coincidence, though. ;)
April 30, 2013 at 8:48 AM
Stephanie Newton said…
It sounds like he's got a sleep crutch. An association like that can be good in some cases like when you have a bedtime routine. It's when they start NOT being able to go back to sleep without it that it's trouble. http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-association/

I would do two things. I would tell him he can't wake mommy and daddy unless...whatever he would understand. I used to say blood, fire, or sickness.

I would also try to attach the blankets together into one, whether it's sewing them together or putting them in a duvet type thing to make it one large blanket. I wouldn't take them away, but you want the sleep association to be something he can manage, not something that requires you.

That's not a lot of help...either way, you're probably going to have a week or so of him waking up and you coaching him through going back to sleep on his own.
April 30, 2013 at 9:37 AM
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